Sunlight inches in and the Flickering of Christmas lights tip toe away, hanging flakes and single colored alternating patterns keep me company throughout the night. A prayer is all I need to bare the haunting glimpses of her smile that hide from me like curtains hide my world from the sun, yet still crawls in through the splits and brightens my room non-reaching my orbiting heartache. This room without insulation mimics the brisk I walk in from, this day a rest for my numb hands but a work day for my longing heart to spiral in and out of emotion. I had to look at what is not there to see, incognito was unhelpful and only a magnifying glass to a bread crumb. How can one forget the fear that ended all fears but still remember the eyes which gifted pulse signs and paddled finds of breath once again the surface. I wait for no return, my love is sent ahead, bus stop sitting eager search at a corner to welcome a turn of a familiar face.