You don’t know how beautiful this world is until the car door is opened and your getting in it to strap on that seat belt and take a ride. It’s a beautiful mess, the unimaginable thoughts and feelings that have cut through my very soul like words slice through air. I wish everyone could appreciate the little things as much as the big things and that time really doesn’t exist when it’s running out. In fact I don’t think about time anymore and the clocks around my room and house have been unplugged to keep that reminder from reminding.
Every morning through the few broken blinds and the thin two layers of merlow curtains the sun crawls into my room without invite. Faster and brighter as my eyes adjust the transition from what I don’t know and what feels like awaking dream into dream. Hours pass masked in the daylight like minutes at times and the nights drag me into solitude and peaceful discoveries of un-embarrassed giggling talents and the sorrow puncturing tip of reality feeding lumber into my furnace.
Fuck death, I shit bigger than death in the mornings. I was never scared of anything except hurting someone or losing loved ones. Kindness can be mistaken for weakness but in all reality, no body wants to see the “Hulk”. Lol